Monday, July 31


I get overwhelmed.
A lot.
When that happens,
I shut down.
Take for example, today. I Deadlines, a presentation to the city, a report for the city, and I am spectacularly behind. Seems to me most people would work harder. Get their butts in gear, start working feverishly until they felt better about their situation. Me? Apparently I like to wallow in my panic. Just let it marinade and soak until I have the inevitable self break-down.
I make lists like it's my job, but I shirk my job like it's an addiction.
No patience. No persistance.
If everything was like dancing, imagine how fast I would have it done.
But I feel so compelled to keep a blog.
Maybe it's the exhibitionist in me, knowing that whatever I write someone will read. (read: ego!)
It might be the procrastination factor of a blog. I spend a lot of time on the internet and a lot of time doing things to put off the more important stuff like.....a job.
Or maybe I feel it will be easier than the real journal I try to keep.
I always have lots of thoughts in my head at any one time, so the journal ends up destroyed because I write ALL kinds of notes in it.
We'll see. I'll probably just delete it. Meh, it's just internet space, right??

Currently I'm procrastinating my internship work. I have to call 4 teenage volunteers to see if they will continue to help. Because I need to count 2000 more trees. And I'm pretty sure I can't do it by myself in 3 weeks. It was exciting this morning because I met with the city and found out some more facts about the internship. IE: getting paid!!! My professor was away for a month and the contract is probably sitting in his mailbox. He has to mail it back and then they will send the check. Which means I won't be paid for a long long time because he is going away for another 3 weeks. ::sigh:: I need that money! Good thing I have that part time job.

My wrists are starting to act up again. I have an appt with a physician assistant at an orthepedist this week. So hopefully she can help me figure out what to do.

Hm....I wonder if the teenagers are up by now?
*ring ring*
Cheerfull Tree Hugger: Hello! How are you?!?
Sleepy Teenager: mumble, mumble...
CTH: Great! I was wondering if you are able to come out and walk aroung in the heat and the sun staring at trees for free?
ST: uhhhh...what?
CTH: Fantastic! Meet me at the park in an hour! Bye!!!

Muahaha. sweet sweet power!